Copyright © 2004, Patrick K. Kroupa
All Rights Reserved
Original Publication: Heroin Times
“Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.”
“I have not failed; I have just found ten thousand ways that won’t work.”
“It’s kind of fun to do the impossible.”
These are a collection of ibogaine-related articles which were originally published in Heroin Times between 2000 and 2002. The initial piece appeared about 6 months after I’d first cleaned up from heroin, through the use of ibogaine. The last article wraps up the Addiction mini-series, and was written towards the end of 2002.
In retrospect they’re interesting to me, because they provide an overview of my headspace and shit I was dealing with post-ibogaine; while coping with consensual reality, sans junk. In other words: it’s the first time in my entire adult life, I’d ever existed without having a habit. I started using heroin at 14, and wrapped up my relationship with it, a little past age 30.
The articles are presented exactly as they were published — with the single exception of fixing the whacked-out formatting Heroin Times used to display ’em, in order to fit into their Magazine with Pages motif.
While I disagree with pretty much nothing contained herein, it isn’t something I’d bother writing today. So, thusly, if you have some overwhelming emotional response to sumthin’ that appears within these pages… well, toss your email into a time-machine and send it back to the year 2000.
For what it’s worth, this is a little over four years later. I still haven’t caught an imaginary disease; still haven’t taken a word of any “treatment professional’s” advice, and … I’m still clean.
In conclusion: I win. Winning is GOOD. Beating something that has kicked your ass in for every single day of your entire life … well, that absolutely fucking rocks.
Here’s the FIRST and LAST step: Just keep getting back up … because eventually, you will stand. All that you MUST do, is believe.
If you have enough faith; engage intellect, and apply force of will … mountains move and all reality rearranges itself around you. It IS possible to go from drowning, to walking on water. If you truly believe, then you make it so.